Two-time Olympic champion track cyclist Victoria Pendleton CBE says she has “so much FOMO” if she says no to anything.
That’s why she recently paddled a racing kayak (“As someone who considers themselves to have quite good balance, that is next-level tippy,” she says) and why, on retiring from cycling in 2012, she took up horse racing.
“I do like to say yes to things, I have so much FOMO if I don’t,” says the 45-year-old with a grin. “Everyone I spoke to who had an interest or understanding of horses said, ‘Don’t do it, it’s too dangerous, can’t be done, ridiculous idea,’ but it turned out to be a complete lifeline for me.”
People should know not to tell Pendleton she can’t do things – this is a woman who will not be scared off. Born in Stotfold, Bedfordshire, she won the sprint Olympic gold at Beijing in 2008, and followed up with Keirin gold and sprint silver at London 2012. And that doomed horse racing career? Well, she finished fifth at Cheltenham in 2016, an incredible achievement for a new jockey.
“One of the things I reflect on from having a twin brother is that he gave me a sense of fearlessness. I was quite a tomboy, and we played together and grew up together, and I always had someone by my side, so it gave me confidence, like a superpower,” says Pendleton, whose beloved brother Alex died in 2023 from a brain tumour.
Then, in October 2025, after a long battle with Parkinson’s, their dad Max, Pendleton’s first bike trainer, died too.
“[They were] two very pivotal men in my life, who would always be like, ‘You can do it. You’ve got this 100%’. Everybody needs people in their corner like that, giving them encouragement and pushing them towards their boundaries,” she says. “How lucky I am to have had that, that no one told me ‘No’.”
Particularly as it came from men, who “really made me feel like an equal”.
“Sadly, many men I met have not made me feel that way on my journey through elite sport,” she says archly, having previously spoken about the bullying she endured during her cycling career, particularly the fallout when her relationship with Scott Gardner, a Team GB sports scientist, was revealed. She and Gardner divorced in 2018.
Now it’s part of her mission to be the person that’s “ferocious” in other people’s corners. “I want to be the one on your shoulder going, ‘You can do it. You’ve got to believe in yourself,’” says Pendleton brightly. “I would love to be that person encouraging people to move forward and move through the things that scare them. I’ve been lucky enough to experience what’s on the other side of those things, and it’s been tremendous.”
Which is why, despite being “horrible at spelling”, she’s written a new book, The Fear Opportunity, to help people utilise dread and terror, rather than be crushed by them.
Writing the book after her brother passed away, she grills neuroscientists, sports and developmental psychologists and hopes that, “Off the back of going through quite a tough time, I’ve managed to create something positive to help other people overcome their fears, or perhaps reframe things in order to make the most of this small, precious life we have been given.
“Because that’s really how I feel, having lost my brother and my father, that life is so short.”
The book actually began as a way to answer the question: “Is there something wrong with me in the way I’ve lived my life post-retirement and the sports I’ve taken up?” muses Pendleton, who pitched herself into Strictly Come Dancing, started surfing (“If I was a man, no one would think twice about me taking up surfing age 40-something,” she notes with an eye-roll) tackled Celebrity SAS: Who Dares Wins (through which she met her partner, Louis Tinsley) and switched push-bikes for motorcycles.
She even attempted Everest with Ben Fogle in 2018, but was forced to stop after suffering hypoxia, caused by a lack of oxygen, which left her severely depressed.
Looking back, she says: “I fully understand why I made the decision to climb Everest, and see what a bad idea it was, given the fact I was running away from my personal life in order to do something that made me feel comfortable – which was use my body in an extreme scenario, training and working towards an objective, rather than address things that were difficult and upsetting and the divorce.
“At the time, I didn’t realise I was running away, it just seemed like a good idea to me. That was perhaps a little bit naive of me, but hey, every day is a learning day, right?”
She’s adamant though that the book is not about getting people to commit to “big, scary, adrenaline junkie challenges. It’s about understanding your own fears and seeing them differently”. For instance, for her, childcare is one. “When my sister left me looking after one of my nephews as a baby, I was like, ‘Oh, my God. What do I do? What if I need to go to the toilet?’” she says with a laugh. “A lot of people would be like, ‘What are you talking about? Totally unnecessary fear there.’ But it’s all relative.”
The fear she’s most struggled with is fear of failure. “I’m a people pleaser. I really want to do well, prove myself worthy and successful in other people’s eyes, and make my dad proud,” she explains.
“[Sports psychiatrist at British Cycling] Steve Peters really helped me with that post-Athens Olympics,” says Pendleton, who became a World, European and Commonwealth champion. “Otherwise I would have been crippled under the fear of failure after going out in the first round of my first-ever Olympics, thinking, ‘I’m not worthy’ and, ‘I shouldn’t be here’, which would have been crazy.”
Today she has very few fears, “Because I like to confront them, because I want to eliminate them”, she says. “If I’m faced with something I find challenging and daunting, and it brings up all those butterflies, your breathing quickens and your mouth goes dry, I’m always like, ‘Bring it on.’”
Pendleton now lives in Dorset, where she wakes up early, runs through the countryside (“I spend so much time in the forest”) and takes her horse Sarah for “snacks and hacks” when she’s not working out in her home gym or managing the house renovation she’s doing (“It’s a lot more expensive than it set out to be,” she says. “I’ve watched Grand Designs and it happens every single time!”).
But no matter what fears there are to eliminate next, Pendleton feels most alive and at peace “being literally face-to-face with the velvety, warm nose of a horse,” she says. “That is just heaven.”
The Fear Opportunity by Victoria Pendleton is published by Bluebird, priced £16.99. Available now.